The
parched Arizona highway was void of life less Död and his familiar resting high upon a
charred branch. When Jager took flight, Död followed. It had been too long and his hunger raged.
Through the windshield of his
flat-black Vandenbrink GTO, he spied her. Worn weary by the road or life...or both, she
walked, thumb out, pleading for rescue.
She was young and fresh and perfect for his needs.
Duivel commissioned harvest of the
kidneys, heart, and other marketable organs.
Död would get the rest.
His lips smoothed into a tender smile
as he halted the thrumming engine.
I hope you enjoyed my twenty-fifth installment of flash fiction. Thank you to Madison for manning the helm. Check out her blog to play with the #FridayFictioneers and don't forget to join the Facebook page for additional updates and information.
wow -- tender smile, grim ending -- well done
ReplyDeleteThe nice smile often hides what is behind the scenes, doesn't it? Thank you for reading and commenting.
Delete~Susan
I enjoyed it...in a totally yucky way...which means it worked. Good job.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Janet. It was yucky but fun to write.
Delete~Susan
Gruesome! :)
ReplyDeleteYes indeed! I'm glad you liked it!
Delete~Susan
"... the thrumming engine." That's a nice metaphor. It almost neutralizes the blood-chilling operation that went on there.
ReplyDeleteNice work.
http://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/12/soliloquy-of-a-disgruntled-raven/
I intended to include that the engine noise stopped as the rumbling of his hunger increased but ran out of words. I'm glad the line worked by itself. Thanks for saying so!
Delete~Susan
Creepy. Hitchcock is getting his due this week.
ReplyDeletewww.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com/2012/07/arson.html
I love Hitchcock! Thank you for the comparison!
Delete~Susan
chills.....reminded me of a movie about organ. Great writing.
ReplyDeletehttp://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/friday-fictioneers-the-river/
It would make a great movie...I can almost see it now.
DeleteThank you!
~Susan
A deliciously disturbing little story. Just the right blend of horror and suspense.
ReplyDeleteDeliciously disturbing...thank you for the excellent compliment. Speaking of delicious, I wonder what Död does intend to do with "the rest."
Delete~Susan
Wow. Horror. Noir. Atmosphere. You nailed it.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for commenting...
Delete~Susan
Chilling little story - captured the prompt perfectly.
ReplyDeletehttp://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/every-cloud-friday-fictioneers-july-2012/
Thank you, Sandra. It gives me the heebeegeebees and I wrote it!
Delete~Susan
This is reason number one never to hitchhike! My word! What sorts of demons lurk to steal your life and harvest your organs. Nice in a totally grossed out/creeped out way.
ReplyDeleteOn our way back from California earlier this week, I saw a very young girl hitchhiking and the story began to formulate. When I saw the photo, I knew I could make it work!
Delete~Susan
Welcome to the dark side. Abandon all hope, ye who hitchhike here...
ReplyDeleteSusan, i loved this story. From the names to the lean, spare language, to the terrible conclusion, it rocked and rolled my senses. One of your best (and congrats on your 25th story here)
Aloha,
Doug
http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/roadkill/
I'm glad you liked the names...I wanted a foreign word for "death" that sounded cool in English and found Död...which is Dutch then had to find a Dutch supercar and ended up with the Vandenbrink GTO (which is one sweet ride - I am a car nut too). Jager is Dutch for "hunter" and Duivel means "demon." So...I did put a lot of thought into it and am pleased that you liked!
Delete~Susan
Chilly and full of suspense. Great take on the prompt. Mine is here and linked too: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/fridayfictioneers-spectators/
ReplyDeleteThank you for stopping by and commenting. I'm off to your pretty green blog!
Delete~Susan
The harvester and the harbinger. Cool.
ReplyDeletehttp://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/flash-fiction-friday-harbinger/#comment-1075
I'm glad you caught that. How handy to have a vulture do your searching, huh?
Delete~Susan
Bloodthirsty comes to mind, nice lead up to the ultimate moment, happy to escape before the next bit :)
ReplyDeletehttp://wp.me/s1nUrn-buzzard
I would love to do a whole book just from this opening. I hate to think - though - just how dark it would get if I continued. Thank you for reading.
Delete~Susan
I loved it! This is a story I love--detailed, compact, yet still mysterious. <3
ReplyDeletehttp://quillshiv.com/2012/07/12/lady-of-war/
Thank you very much. I haven't liked my last couple - they seemed forced. But this one pleased me too.
Delete~Susan
You had me at Gto and I liked the harbinger looking for fresh victims. Nicely done. Thank you for stopping in.
ReplyDeleteHere is my offering at yaralwrites.com
I am a car nut and I had to pick the perfect car for death to drive. I'm glad you approve!
Delete~Susan
This was beautifully done. Good plot. Well-written. Makes mine look even worse.
ReplyDeleteThank you Marilyn. I like yours too...they are your words, so you should be proud of them! :)
Delete~Susan
Hi Susan,
ReplyDeleteWow, so much going on here. Organ mechants, buzzards, a hitcher, all woven together skillfully in 100 words. I love the word thrum. By the way, you were dead on in your comment on my story.
Ron
"dead on"...haha. Very punny. And, thank you for your comment. I always like to hear what you and Doug have to say. Thanks for stopping by!
Delete~Susan
And I meant to add: Thanks for recycling!
ReplyDeleteRon
But of course...
DeleteHet was erg leuk en een beetje eng! Ik vind het heel goed. Good job, really enjoyed that!
ReplyDeleteBeste, Mikaela
http://mysocalleddutchlife.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/canyon-ff-friday-the-13th-of-july-12/
Haha...Hartelijk dank! How funny that you happened to see this. Now I have to come check out "mysocalledDutchlife"...
Delete~Susan